Without feedback from our environment, we will perish very quickly. If you try to take a deep breath and do not realize that you are underwater, you will likely drown. If you try to run forward and do not realize that you are on the edge of a cliff, you could die. If it is ten degrees below zero, you are not aware of it, and you don’t put a coat on, you could die. Our health and safety depends on our awareness of the conditions of our environment. This is why we have our five senses: vision, smell, taste, touch, and hearing to give us feedback about our environment so that we can be safe.
Michael Jackson and Elvis Presley would not listen to people. If anyone gave them feedback they banished or fired them. This was the cause of their premature death. When others give you feedback, do you help them feel safe to talk with you?
Leprosy is not a disease that makes your toes or fingers fall off. Leprosy stops the feedback coming in from your extremities to your brain. When people have Leprosy they become injured, they are not aware of the injury, and their wounds become infected, either the patient has them removed or the infection will kill them. With leprosy it is no problem to cut off your finger as you have no sensation of pain. Leprosy is a disease of communication and lack of feedback from the body to the brain.
Feedback is why babies learn so fast. Babies observe the world and are not afraid to be made fun of, laughed, and being a failure. Babies observe an action, trait, or word and try to copy and mimic this over and over again. No matter how many times they fail, they will keep repeating this until they become successful. Babies have no shame. This is why they learn so quickly. It is only when babies learn shame does their learning slow down and become difficult for them.
When babies become good at one thing, they move onto the next thing. If you ever said “I wish I could learn as fast as a baby!” Now you can.
You have to get rid of guilt and shame in order to improve and accept feedback. A single-pointed mind is not clouded with how poorly you are at something. A single-pointed mind observes the world without such judgements. These judgements will only get in your way. This single pointed mind (ekagra) is our tool that we use to insure our well being. All of these terms are the same: mindfulness, meditation, focus, concentration, and the single pointed mind. Without these we will not be getting the most out of our lives.
Right now stop and pay attention to what is immediately in front of you. Look out a window and hold as still as possible, only move your breath. If you feel confused about breathing, continue breathing out until your body says “breathe in” and only breathe in until body says “breathe out”. Do not rush in with your judgements, these judgements will only bring in shame, anger, and fear into our observation. These judgements will only cloud your observations. Let the clouds pass and experience the world around you.
Allow a few hours to pass and journal the observation. Only write about what you observed without judgement. A few hours after this writing exercise, write again with judgement what you have observed, and notice what it is that you really needed to judge.
The next time you receive feedback from your boss, your mom, or significant other. Instantly move to this observation state. Taking in information, only asking a few questions for clarification. After a few hours write down the information that you have received from the feedback. As before, a few hours after writing the observations write the judgements that you have that you still find important. Then and only then should you take action on your judgements.
This will eliminate anger, pain, and shame from your life. This will empower you to make improvements in your life and put you on the path in the direction you want to go.
Feedback is used in machine learning or computer programming. In 1957 a computer programmer wanted to teach his computer how to play checkers. he figured programming all of the possible moves and outcomes would probably take a thousand years to write the programs. he felt that he didn’t have that much time available to him. He wrote a simple program that allowed the computer to make mistakes and corrections. After several months of the program running on the computer, the computer was able to write its own program on how to play chess, and could do so flawlessly. Since that time, there have been no programs that have been entirely written by human beings.
Machines can learn things in days what humans would spend hundreds of years on. Machines have no Lizard Brain to create guilt, blame, or shame. If we want to have the power of machine learning in ourselves, we need to lesson the control our Lizard Brain has over our lives. By increasing our practise of meditation/observation/mindfulness, we will vastly enable our power to receive feedback in the world.
The reason most people work with a coach is to receive feedback from a skilled expert. Any athlete who wants to win the olympics or a super bowl always has a coach. Any person who wants to excel in business always finds a mentor for another perspective of what they can do better. Any person that wants to solve problems in relationships, always gets a relationship coach.
In Kaivala we are here to be a coach and direct you with feedback. We are also open to feedback that you may have for us to make adjustments and corrections as time goes on. You will need to do you homework, practise meditation/observation.mindfulness, and attend classes every week.You will need to give us feedback on what you have learned so that we can help you more.
We also have coaching that you can request for personal attention and feedback. What will follow are some more videos and information on receiving feedback with people in our lives. We will have more exercises using stickies to clearly understand feedback that you are receiving from the world around you. This will also help you more effectively establish your tribe so they can help guide you with your passion. We are not trying to give you a program that worked for someone else. We are helping you find things that work for you and ways that you can do those things better. And we are open to your feedback. :-)
