Finding Your Tribe Level 6

In finding your tribe are you trying to create of abnormality, the status quo, or the heretic? People like Simon Sinek and Seth Godin are the heretics. The status quo for advertising always defined what your product was and what what your product did is what needed to be featured. Simon Sinek was able to demonstrate that The Why of your product is more important than The What or The How. For years many product startups were based on how they were similar to already existing success stories. Seth Godin showed how the difference between your company and your product is what makes your product stand out and get noticed. 

For years in the sports industry coaches always felt that they needed to idolize the best players, give them a free pass, and promote their superiority over the rest of the team. Coach Wooden, an English teacher given an unlikely job of coaching the world’s worst basketball team was a heretic when he rejected these ideas. Instead, he insisted on punctuality, respect for others, and uncompromising scholastic expectations. If any team member could not follow these norms they were cut off the team no matter how good they were. His heresy created one of the most successful and winning teams in history. 

Challenging the status quo requires a large commitment. When you challenge what-is 99% of the people will fight against you or laugh and try to humiliate you. A heretic must believe in themselves and move forward in spite of the odds against them. They need to be able to withstand ridicule, physical violence, and constant opposition. The majority of people are stuck deep in The Lizard Brain which is not comfortable with change. Change requires mental processing and rearranging which The Lizard does not possess. In order to maintain its power and safety The Lizard fights to maintain all of its marbles and ducks in a row. 

The heretic does not want nor does it ever want a statue built for them.  Statues are always built for people when their ideas become the status quo, and this will be many years after their death. You cannot fault other people because they become confused about other ideas or actions because they just do not have the mental power to conceive or act upon your ideas or directions. If you are trying to describe Einstein's they will usually run from you, and head for the safety and security of their blanket. 

Pema Chodron is a Buddhist nun who works in a monastery in Nova Scotia. She works hard to benefit the lives of other people. Does she do this for the glory or because this is her passion? You may have never heard of her. She is not interviewed on Fox News. Her work is just as important as the Dalai Lama. You have heard of the Dalai Lama, but not of her. The only reason the Dalai Lama is popular is because he is involved in a political conflict with China. A great leader does things to help other people, not to get recognized. Great leaders work to strengthen their tribes and are not concerned in standing out in their tribe. When you abuse the attention that you are getting you are taking something away from the tribe. 

The world’s best coach always talks quietly to the team. They never shout, scream, or are abusive to their team. No one is bullied or belittled by the coach. The coach cares about everyone with the tribe and is patient with all. When a good coach is no longer there the coaching continues. Each member of the team or tribe will try to emulate the coach and will continue to encourage and aid other members of their team. 

You do not want everybody in the world to be a member of your team. This is where The Law of Repulsion comes into play. The Law of Repulsion is when you do not make superficial changes just to appease the common man. The Law of Repulsion requires that you do not wear special clothing just because everyone else does. The Law of Repulsion means that you are not constantly worried about the opinions of other people, but you are concerned about the direction and the execution of your passion. 

In order to become a heretic it will require that you experience discomfort and suffer. When you are going against the norm other people will withhold housing, food, or money in order to punish you and get you back on track toward the status quo. This is like a parent telling their child, “You can move back home and stay with me as long as you get a job.” The child may be working on a project that could end world hunger and provide energy for all, but the parent in order to get their child back in place insists that they get a job even though more funds are not needed to run the household. 

If being a heretic and a leader were easy then everyone would do it. This is why leaders are said to be following their passion. It is because their ideas and actions induce great pain in their life. What they are trying to do is far more important to them than the pain and suffering that they are receiving. It is uncomfortable to propose projects and ideas that have a possibility of failing. If you are not willing to fail, then you are not a heretic or leader. Which is just great because not everyone can be followers also. 

Now that you know yourself better you can ask yourself the question “Do I want to be a leader?” “Do I want to be a follower?” “Do I want to challenge the norm?” “Do I want to go with the grain?’ If you want to be a leader you will need to find your tribe to lead. If you want to be a follower you will need to find your tribe to follow. Only through mindfulness and self-examination can you take the correct course of action.