Your Passion Level 5
Do you always seem to be concerned about what other people think of you? Are you letting this inhibit you from carrying out your passion? At times do you find yourself paralyzed because of what other people think?
In trying to discover what our passion is we need to be careful that it is not a passion of conformity. If you were constantly concerned about having the latest shoes, the latest clothes, the sexiest accent, and the right style of car, this would be a passion of conformity. This would be different than if you discovered a group of people creating a program to terraform Mars, so you conform to fit their needs. This is not a bad conformity because it fits into your predetermined passion for terraforming Mars.
If we are always overly concerned about whether people like us or not, it will inhibit our ability to be creative. An artist (one who is creative) does not care if people do not like their work. A business person will adjust the product, color size, and shape so that a majority of the customers will like their product. An artist produces art. An artist arouses passion in other people. As we know the word passion means to suffer and endure pain.
This pain that the artist produces in other people will cause them to wake up. This pain that the artist produces helps others achieve orgasm. To achieve orgasm we all understand requires lots of effort and lots of pain. What the artist produces normally is called aesthetically pleasing. This word aesthetic means to wake up and be aware. When you go to the hospital for surgery, they give you an anesthetic. This is used to hide the pain, put you to sleep, or make you unaware of what is going on in the world.
When your teacher, your preacher, or your manager is droning on and on, and you are falling asleep, then they are creating an anesthetic. When you see, feel, hear, or taste art this will wake you up, and make you stop and think, and make you feel anger, joy, or pain.
If you are an artist, you should not be concerned if other people like you or like your art. If you wish to be an entrepreneur, then you may need to be more concerned if people like what you produce. As with all things in life, we must find a balance. Just as in with the extremes of Zen and Pachi Mamma, Yin, and Yang, or Good and Evil, we need to find a balance. We will never be in just one extreme or the other.
People Pleasers are never well liked by the group. The group always admires the Rebel and the Rebel doesn’t care. They have their own agenda, they will step in and help a cause temporarily, and then move on to a new phase.
If you can find one or two people in your life who really like you, then you are doing really well. If you get three or four, then this is truly amazing! If you get more than five, then there could be some problems. If too many people like you, then this could mean that you are sacrificing your principles and passions, just to be liked. You may find thousands or hundreds of thousands of people that like one aspect of you. For example, a singer may be liked because of their voice and the songs that they sing, but everyone may hate their rude and inconsiderate attitude. A few may also be liked because they can ride a horse or ride a motorcycle. If you had to live with these people, you very likely would be displeased with many of the things that they do.
Even with people who really like us as our parents, significant others, or best friends, they will still find many things that they dislike or do not approve of, about us. If we are constantly worried and concerned that our friends of group may not like the clothes we wear, the car we drive, the way we smell, our makeup, our job, our education, our house, or our goldfish, then we are making ourselves of less value.
You can think about all of the people in your life that you admire, and you could also think about all of the things that irritate you or you do not like, and you still admire them anyway. If you wait in line at a checkout counter you will see headlines on the tabloids with pictures of wealthy famous well liked people that are dressing poorly, getting arrested for Dui’s, or gaining too much weight. Yet all of their followers buy these magazines admire them, and follow them even more.
You may have noticed that many artists go out of their way to be rude and inconsiderate, and they still have followers and people who admire them. This does not mean that you must copy their attitude. In dealing with people we need to be honest with our judgement of others. When people complain that we do not have enough material things or money, then we can call them out for their shallow or materialistic attitude. When people complain that they are overweight or that they don’t have enough energy, then we can tell them to get off their ass and exercise. When they ask if the dress makes them look fat, and it does, you can say “Yeah, please don’t wear that dress.”
Of course, we want to be caring and compassionate people. We want to use empathy when dealing with others. There is no reason to be rude, just to be rude. When we go to a gathering that is “black tie” we can wear “black tie”. On casual Fridays we can be cautiously casual. When going shopping at Walmart we can wear clothing that will be appropriate for our body style and not be offending others. If we go to a party and realize that their opinion of casual is different from ours, we don’t need to stress because our clothing is quite right. If you go to a Halloween party dressed as a zebra, and upon arriving you learn that it is not a costume party, you can enjoy the notoriety. We all do things that are not correct. We forget our zipper. We get toilet paper on our shoes. And sometimes we don’t match our colors. All of this is ok.
If people are not willing to overlook these things, you shouldn’t want them as your friends, and you shouldn’t want them in your group. When we are with our tribe, we will feel safe. These are the people that we want to be a part of our intimate circle of friends.
Your main concerns should be, what your goals are, what your desires are, and what your passions are. When people become concerned because they are living in a miniature home rather than a large house, they can become quite satisfied knowing that their housing payment affords them to do their passion. When people become concerned about your mode of transportation you can laugh at yourself knowing that they spend a week a month paying for something to get them around while you have this time to pursue your passion. When people berate or humiliate you, you can smile, and feel bad for them that they are so enslaved.
When people get upset or try to scream at you or make fun of you, this is a good time to just Observe. You can Observe their blood vessels popping out of their skin. You can Observe the damage that they are doing to their bodies with their anger. You can Observe the time that they are wasting in trying to make you conform. By disconnecting from their Judgement of you, you will free yourself from judging yourself based on your terms. Any judgment that you use should be based on your passion. If you realize that you need to get up earlier in the morning so that you can do your passion, then you need to get up earlier in the morning. If you realize that you need more education to do your passion, then you need to get more education to do your passion. If you need more resources to do your passion, then you need to get more resources. All of these Judgements need to be based on what you need to do with your Passion.
Likewise, we also need to understand that we do not need to like or approve of every single thing that our friends or members of our tribe are doing. They may have personal habits or opinions that we do not like. This does not mean that they cannot be our friends or part of our tribe. There are always things that are deal breakers, and we will have to determine what those things are. As we have learned, whatever we want we must give away, so if we want more people to be patient and compassionate with us, we must do the same with them.
Become more forgiving of your own imperfections. Realize that we will be harder on ourselves than others are with us. Letting go of shame and blame that we can give to others, and letting go of shame and blame that others may be putting on us will make our lives more joyous, and enjoyable.
You are great and wonderful. Keep up the good work. :-)
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#thehumancondtion
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